Time Out!!! You need to think this decision through before you invite anyone to be in your wedding.
The first people you need to think about are the people that are, have been, and will be the closest to you. Family. Do you have a sister? Does your fiancé have a sister?
Who is your best friend now? Your best friend from High School? Your best friend growing up? Maybe these are the same person, but maybe not.
Picture yourself standing at the altar. Who is next to you? Who is it that you simply must have in your wedding party?
Now you have a starting point and it is time to decide how many bridesmaids you want. Think 3-5. More than that and the personal intimacy of the day and your time with each of them starts to slip away. We have all seen the final shot from “27 Dresses” where the camera starts to pan across the bridesmaids and it keeps going, and going, and going…….
Once you have decided on your bridesmaids, it is time to talk to your fiancé. Tell him that you have selected four bridesmaids, and it is time for him to select four groomsmen. Go back to those same questions that helped you select your bridesmaids to help him narrow down his choices.
If your best friend is a guy or his best friend is a girl, adjust the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen.
Now both of you have more friends and family than fit in the bridesmaids and groomsmen. Well, you still need ushers, guest book attendants, personal attendants and anything else that you can think of.
Let’s not forget the cutest roles, the flower girl and ring bearer. You need to decide if you want children in your wedding and then select them carefully. If it is important to you that they actually go down the aisle, then you need to consider their ages. Anyone under the age of two is not very likely to go down the aisle by themselves. However, there are other ways to get them down the aisle. The cutest little ring bearers that we have ever seen were pulled down the aisle in a John Deere wagon by an usher. Another ran down the aisle because grandpa had a toy he wanted and was making it dance from his pew in front. Between the ages of two and four, it really depends on the personality of the child. An outgoing 3 year old or a 4 year old “princess” that is really into your wedding will be reliable. A shy one will not.
Another consideration when picking your wedding party is financial. If you know it will be a hardship financially for someone you have chosen, offer to pay for part or all of their travel expenses.
Finally, know that you are walking into a minefield by choosing your wedding party. When choices are made, feelings can be hurt. Be sensitive, especially if there is someone you had to leave out that you know you really shouldn’t have left out.
For more help in planning your Omaha Wedding, go to OmahaWedding.tv.